TRIGGER WARNING: This article may cause some upset to survivors of rape and sexual violence. It may cause some upset to all readers.

Womankind is currently in support of PHSE of becoming part of the national curriculum.

“This is an exciting and excellent opportunity to get lessons on healthy relationships, gender stereotypes and violence against women into the school curriculum. To ensure that young people receive education to prevent violence against women. It is really important that there is a positive response to this consultation. (Apparently there have been 16,000 negative responses!)”

Hannah White

UK Policy Manager @Womankind

(There is an online questionnaire for this, so if you want to show your support in on young people having PSHE)

An example of why we need Personal Social Health Economic Education in schools? Here you go.

Dispatches: Rape In the City – Anybody watch this? It was on Channel 4, Monday 22nd June, at 8pm.

I watched it, I had to. I wanted to get a glimpse into the teenage world, and learn a little more about what they are facing.

Gang rape and lots of it.

I was horrified by this. Not because I had no idea such things happen, but because I didn’t realise to what extent. Girls are being ‘punished’ by boys through rape and sexual assault. Also, let’s not forget the part some girls play in encouraging these boys to rape.

Young girls are threatened with knives, beaten and gang raped, sometimes for hours, sometimes recorded on mobile phones. Young girls organising rapes to fit in with gangs, and also out of fear the same might happen to them. The attitudes the boys had towards girls and sex were appalling to say the least. One girl had been invited around to a friend’s house; on the understanding they were going to watch a DVD together. Instead, she had found he had invited round some friends who then raped her. She was tricked.

Another girl witnessed a gang rape at a party, but walked away because she was scared it might happen to her. She said “There was just loads of boys and the girl’s tights were ripped up, like, she was bleeding as well, because I think she was a virgin, and they were just taking turns on her basically, and she was crying, and I didn’t get involved because I thought if I get involved they’re gonna turn on me.”

According to some of the girls interviewed for this programme, teenage boys don’t understand what rape is.

This is not the first time I have seen something like this.

Who is to blame here?

Teenagers? Well they have to learn such behaviour and attitudes from somewhere, surely? And it can’t be about what they are wearing, wearing a hoodie doesn’t make you a rapist.

What about parents? We can only teach our children what we can, but we can’t always control what they learn when they are out and about, can we? Our children can be just as affected by society as we are.

Or school? Shouldn’t PSHE involve some form of sex education, and maybe something about respectful relationships?

We need to be making a difference for children and young people. It frightens me that this is something my daughter could be exposed to or experience, as this is her generation. It frightens me that if I have a son, he might think this behaviour is acceptable, because his friends say so. Teens hurting other teens in this way is incredibly wrong, and it has to stop.

Colleagues of mine deliver a domestic violence programme in schools, as part of PSHE. They talk about domestic violence, good and bad feelings, positive relationships, bullying etc. They deliver this programme in primary schools and secondary schools, teaching through activities which encourage all to take part. They also go in at break times, giving children the opportunity to come and speak to them in a ‘safe surgery’ about anything that might be worrying them. Disclosures are made, and my colleagues work with teachers to make sure any necessary steps are taken, and the child is safe. This is for domestic violence, and it works well.

Now, the same awareness needs to be raised on sexual violence.

Schools need to teach our children about sexual violence and sexual harassment. They need to know what is and isn’t acceptable. They need to know what rape is. They need to know what sexual assault is. This is important for both girls and boys. Boys need to know that it is unacceptable to treat girls and young women with such disrespect. Girls need to know this isn’t ‘normal’ and it is not acceptable to help organise something which harms another person in this way. It isn’t something you ‘allow’ because you want to be popular. That isn’t a real choice, surely?

The Dispatches programme mentioned teenage girls agreeing to oral sex with two or three boys, and then ordered to ‘have sex’ with six or seven. Otherwise known as rape.

Maybe raising awareness of sexual violence in schools isn’t going to ‘fix’ the ‘problem’. But it’s a start, and it’s got to make some kind of difference.

Gender stereotypes